December 14th, 2009
hot style
Ty-ty
Hello everyone! This clusterfrak comes to us from “MM.” Let’s listen in…
“Wanted to share my tale of woe.
The date: Nov. 16. The train: Green line in Chicago.
During my morning commute, I boarded the usually crowded train to find… an available seat! Oh happy day! I passed the usual crowd huddled by the door on my way to this rare treat of a seat. As I turned to sit, the train suddenly lurched and I was thrown off balance. By reflex, I grabbed for the pole which was right in front of me. Alas - my fingers felt only the texture of cheap White Sox jacket fleece. I didn’t have a chance. Pathetically I fell backward, stepping on an innocent bystander’s foot and HITTING MY FRICKING HEAD on the pole behind me. Thanks jerk. Now people are getting mild concussions and fractured toes because of douchebaggery like yours.
I attach a photo of the DB in violation of common courtesy and of the moment he was too ty-ty to lean anymore.”
Sweet ginger brown, MM. That sucks fat donkey dick, and so does this guy. Thanks for sending this in and I can just feel the sympathy from all our readers as humanity slides further into a PLD dystopia.
Oh yeah, this guy’s shoes were his big attempt to appear more attractive to the gender of his choosing. Unfortunately, he was unable to raise the rest of his game… and he probably hangs out near the American Girl Store, just by chance. Ass.
VN:F [1.1.8_518]
Rating: 7.5/10 (4 votes cast)
Tags: Chicago, CTA, Green Line
Posted in Chicago | 1 Comment »
December 11th, 2009
GIANT D-Bag
Holy crap! Look a the size of this guy! This jagwad comes to us from a concerned citizen in our nation’s capital. We’ll call her “JSS” and bear witness to the gigantic fail that was her commute:
“Dear PLD –
Long time reader; first time submitter. Wanted to make sure you know you aren’t alone out there in Chicago. Here on the DC Metro system, PLDs abound!
This morning I was telling a friend on my commuter train about your website. Not 5 minutes later, I jumped on the Metro’s Red Line where I was ‘fortunate’ enough to be trapped in by, not one, but two of them. Thanks Irony! Unfortunately, they created such a squeezed in cluster-F that I could only manage to get one in the shot. Getting my phone out of my bag was death-defying enough.
What you can’t see in the picture is the PLD who was clogging up the door just to my right, making it, at best, single-file in. The real problem, though, was created by this PLD in the photo. What you also can’t see is all the effing empty space in front of him no one could get to because he was busing, well, leaning. The woman in the immediate foreground tried unsuccessfully to grab the pole, but settled on stretching out for the one overhead. The woman with the black glove managed to grab on while he leaned forward a bit. Yes, he opted for the North Face jacket, which, based on how low he wore his pants and how far that pole was wedged into his ass crack, may have been the only thing separating my trusty Metro gripping equipment from this d-bag’s netherlands.”
Sweet-baby-Jesus-in-spandex, this is haaarrrible! There’s nothing like the falling temperatures to bring out the North-Face-clad epidemic that is the PLD. It’s tragic that it has already reached DC and I feel for you JSS… and the poor lady holding on for dear life while “el gigante” gets comfy.
Thanks for sending this one in JSS! Stay vigilant and we’ll ride out this winter of social discontent together.
Oh yeah, this guy probably wishes he had his golf clubs with him, and you know he has golf clubs, taking up even more room on the train with the enormity of his wonderfulness. Ass.
VN:F [1.1.8_518]
Rating: 9.3/10 (3 votes cast)
Tags: DC, DC Metro, Red Line
Posted in Washington DC | No Comments »
November 19th, 2009
I'm gonna go with the douche-iron
This gem was sent to us from J.K. What the hell is this, J.K.?
“We’ll call this douche the arnold palmer of the seat hogging douchbag world.”
And how, good sir…aaaand how. Three fucking seats? Really? I would keep typing but my head literally exploded all over my keyboard.
Thanks again, J.K. Sorry for the delay.
While we’re talking about the delay, just a quick note. Sometimes your photos land in my junk folder and I don’t see them right away. My apologies in advance.
Oh yeah. This guy is probably trying to pass-off that hand-held blackjack game as some kind of fancy phone and pretending to check his stocks. Ass.
VN:F [1.1.8_518]
Rating: 7.3/10 (3 votes cast)
Tags: BNSF, Chicago, Metra, Seat Hogging
Posted in Chicago, Seat Hogging Douchebags | No Comments »
November 18th, 2009
This is someone's future dad
This one was sent anonymously. Let’s hear the magical story:
“caught a beer drinking pld on the red line yesterday”
Hmmm…sort of anti-climactic. but it’s genius in its simplicity. But seriously, how is that position more comfortable than just holding on to the damn pole?
Keep ‘em coming folks! sendtopld@gmail.com
Oh yeah, this guy probably hates books and the person who writes them all. Ass.
VN:F [1.1.8_518]
Rating: 5.0/10 (1 vote cast)
Tags: Chicago, CTA, Red Line
Posted in Chicago | 1 Comment »
November 16th, 2009
human spaghetti
Really? I mean… REALLY?
I can only hope this photo accurately represents how f-ing crowded it was on the train. Look at the hand at the bottom. Barely able to hold on as the train hurtles away from a brighter tomorrow.
Seriously dude. Seriously. Move.
Oh yeah, this guy probably promises to let your dog out while your gone, forgets and then half-assed-ly attempts to clean up the mess in the hopes you don’t notice. But you do. And he never brings it up. Ass.
VN:F [1.1.8_518]
Rating: 9.0/10 (2 votes cast)
Tags: Blue Line, Chicago, CTA
Posted in Chicago | 1 Comment »
